February 2012
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Led Zeppelin- 1969: If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you. When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me. Kind woman, I give you my all, Kind woman, nothing more.
Nicki Minaj- 2011: You a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe, you a stupid hoe, you a stupid hoe, you a stupid hoe, (yeah) you a, you a stupid hoe, you a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe (stupid, stupid), you a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe (stupid, stupid), you a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe (stupid, stupid) (stupid, stupid)
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Woman: Can I have birth control?
Government: No.
Woman: I got pregnant because I didn't have birth control and I don't want the fetus. Can I have an abortion?
Government: No.
Woman: I gave birth to my child but since I wasn't expecting it, I can't afford daycare. Can I have help paying for it?
Government: No.
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please, someone give me one good reason why gay...
Please.
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Grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.
– My flammable roommate’s fabulous writing professor (via commodore-sparklebutt)
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cosmo tip #174
expertcosmotips:
when he’s close to his climax, lean forward into his ear and whisper “Piss on me. Fucking piss on me but do it in the antarctic so that the pee freezes in mid air while you are pissing off a building and the piss turns to spear’s. impale me with frozen urine and then shit on my butt corpse. Im a fat gay and I want to go to Ice Hell ftw.”
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GOT INTO THE HONORS COLLEGE
I was at work when my dad called the store and told me that I got into the college so I started to scream so my manager shushed me and then I told her and she started screaming and I’ve been so excited since.
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cosmo tip #152
expertcosmotips:
does your man watch anime? oh .. really? well, dump him.
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ifyoucarryonthisway:
i wish someone would love me as much as kanye west loves kanye west
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got into vcu muthafuckaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssss